WAR ......

No.

Not that one.

But I could use a heat-seeking missile or two.

Maybe a drone.

Because I am in warrior-mode now.

The Enemy….

This guy.

Yes … him.

We are not friends.

Now … I live in a 1892 farmhouse with a stone foundation in the midst of a corn field. With three different crawl spaces along with a cellar. Not a basement. Basements have floors. Mine … would remind you of cells during the Spanish Inquisition.

I am going to have a occasional critter.

But for the past several years, the clove-wintergreen-peppermint oil deterrents have seemed to work.

This past fall, I replaced my stove. I was just certain the tell-tale signs of little furry creatures existence would be present when they moved the stove to disconnect the gas.

NOTHING!

I was shocked!

But in the last couple of weeks, I have heard the faint scurry of something in the ceiling above me.

But upon thorough inspection, I see no sign of life in the kitchen.

THE BATTLE ….

Alas … I was checking in the wrong place.

I have a mouse in my bedroom.

*And yes, I am aware there will not be just one mouse. I just need to be delusional to get me through this.*

I opened my nightstand drawer and discovered …. evidence.

So I clean, bleach, throw out, set fire … to everything. I put the cleaned necessary items back in the drawer with a freshly scented deterrent.

And I set sticky traps along the walls … just as the instructions say.

I am ready.

The perimeter is secured.

My nightstand drawer holds the essentials. Vicks, eye drops, pulse ox meter, remote for electric candles, pen, paper, my Slinky ……

and a bottle of CBD pills for nights that I just can't sleep.

It is illegal in the State of Iowa to use cannabis or products with THC for recreational use. So being the law-abiding citizen I am, you would never find me driving the 15.7 miles to procure such items.

But yesterday afternoon …..

I open the drawer to find the bottle of above-mentioned sleep aids knocked over and pills are spilled throughout the drawer.

The mouse is stoned.

I remove everything … clean, bleach, throw out and set fire to the entire lot …. I insert the packet of deterrent.

And new this time …. a sticky pad.

Around 4 am, I hear the sticky pad banging around the drawer.

It is 4 am.

It can stay right there.

I arise without looking into the drawer because …… yuck!!!!!!

I drink coffee.

I get dressed.

I try to embrace every bit a feminist strength I have got because I have to remove a sticky board with an attached mouse from a nightstand drawer.

I am gloved.

I have my disposal gear.

I am ready to disarm the bomb.

The enemy has escaped.

GONE!!

POOF!!

DISAPPEARED!!

The Battle will continue.

I will be swearing a lot.

This is not my strong suit.

Wish me luck.

I am going to need it.

I will talk to you later.

Cathy

www.buymeacoffee.com/misseffie